The Colin and AJ Awards 

Glory. Glamour. Glitz.

The original idea we had for our tenth annual party was to host Colin and AJ’s Champions’ Ball. It would be somewhere gaudy. We’d arrive in a limo and have a girl on each arm. There’d be a red carpet. And there’d be no explanation whatsoever of what the “Champions’ Ball” was.

And as you can see on the invitation above, that idea kind of survived. But rather than linger on some abstract ball, we landed on the idea of hosting our own version of The Oscars, The Colin and AJ Awards.

We could still have a red carpet and glamour, but we could also make lots of stupid videos and celebrate the many collaborators who’ve helped us make the party a success over the years.

AJ was living with his family in Canton, Missouri for all of 2022, so we planned this party in fits and starts from summer onwards. Colin would head up to Canton or AJ would drive down to St. Louis every couple of weeks and we’d brainstorm ideas.

The schtick was going to be create a whole slate of nominees for bogus categories. Nominees and winners would mostly be real friends of ours who’d helped on previous parties. But the nominated projects—which would each get brief clips as they were announced—would all be brand new.

The party kicked off with a self-congratulatory, Oscar-style video celebrating the history of Colin and AJ. Moved into an opening monologue–heavily modeled off of a few real Oscars monologues—by Colin. And then jumped into the awards.

Fake Colin and AJ projects, like “Colin and AJ vs Godzilla” and “Colin and AJ’s Excellent Adventure,” had real clips roll for them. And then nominees, like Justin Paramore and Ariane Rinehart—who’ve helped with past parties and made contributions for these new clips—won award statuettes and made speeches. There was even a self-righteous video raising money for a “good” cause.

The ceremony culminated with the final category, Best Christmas Party, in which Colin and AJ were nominated against two other party planning dues: Colton and TJ, and Colleen and MJ. We had paid actors at the party to portray these characters. Colton and TJ ended up winning, for “Colin and TJ’s Christmas Under the Sea,” and made a magnanimous speech.

Colton and TJ and “Christmas Under the Sea” are long running Colin and AJ ideas. “Christmas Under the Sea” is referenced in Colin and AJ’s Christmas at the Overlook Hotel and has an entire song in Colin and AJ’s Beatles Christmas. And we’ve toyed with throwing “Colton and TJ’s Holiday Sing Song Spectacular” as a surrealist party for years.

After the Award Ceremony ended we all just hung out and drank for the rest of the night. There really wasn’t an Champions’ Ball.